Anger – How are you handling it?

Anger… such a strong emotion. Something we all feel from time to time, but I suspect you were also told to “just deal with it and move on.” But how many of us have been taught how to really deal with this emotion that is healthy?

Some have learned to express it through violence, while some others have learned to suppress it through some activity that becomes an anesthetic rather than actually feeling the emotion – like food, alcohol, drugs, sex, even exercise – which, for the most part, some of these in moderation can be a healthy distraction. However, a lot of suppression can lead to addictions.

But is the answer to suppress it, stuff it down, or take it out on someone else? Or is there a better way to regain your power? Would it be better to just deal with the emotion?

As I mentioned in previous blogs, our emotions are our feedback mechanism, whether we choose to ‘listen’ to them or not. Recognize and acknowledge that you do feel wronged in some way, whether by someone else or even yourself. Take responsibility for how you are feeling.

Below is a little trick that I have learned that may help some of you.

When faced with this lower energy emotion:

  1. In the best way that you can, remove yourself from the trigger and get to a safe place. Staying in the immediate situation may only add fuel to the anger and that would not help the situation.
  2. Give yourself permission to feel what you are feeling. Consider where you are feeling this emotion in your body. Scan your body, and find where you are holding on to this anger.
  3. Then choose to release it, as holding on to this lower energy just builds up the resentment.Use visualization to vent that anger or frustration. Picture a bubble in front of you; and with every part of your body, scream at that bubble, venting this anger. As you are screaming imagine this dark energy leaving your body, filling up that bubble.  Continue to do this until all the anger has left your body, particularly from where you were feeling it in your body, knowing that it no longer serves you to hold on to that emotion. Let out that anger and fill that bubble.
  4. Now that you have released the energy from your body, take back any of your power that you may have lost by holding onto that anger.Imagine a second bubble, a bright beautiful golden bubble, alongside the dark bubble, with a filter between them. Picture that bright golden bubble acting like a vacuum as it starts to pull your power from the dark bubble, through the filter into the golden bubble, leaving behind the dark energy.

    Once all your power is in the golden bubble, imagine that bright golden bubble breaking away from the dark bubble and floating over your head. Once it is directly over you, it pops and showers you with its golden light, but also coats you with your power. You can feel your body absorbing your power, returning your power to you. Take the time to feel that power returning to you, particularly filling up those spaces where you were holding on to the lower energy.

    Now imagine that other dark bubble floating away from you. When it is almost out of sight, you see it popping, and disintegrating into the earth, knowing that this anger no longer has any power over you.

    Feel how it feels now having your power, and no longer holding onto that anger.

  5. When you are ready, come back to your current reality. Check in with yourself. How are you feeling now?

This technique can work for any lower emotion, not just anger. Try it out and I would love to hear about how it may or may not have helped you in anyway.

And now that you have allowed it, release it and regained your power (in a way that does not harm anyone, including yourself), you can take it a step further, dig deeper and come to an understanding of what  this lower emotion was trying to tell you. This is where a Life Coach can help you obtain clarity into what message this emotion was bringing to you. Obtaining this clarity helps you identify choices that you can make: one that may empower you, and bring you closer to your goals or desires, or ones that keep you where you are.

Again, I would love to receive your thoughts, and feedback through the form below and or in the FaceBook group.

‘Till next time, allow yourself to feel your emotions, and not suppress them as they are your guidance system. Stand in your power, knowing that you do have a choice.

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